Category Archives: The Walking Dead

If Meat Is Murder, Is Cannibalism Suicide?

When last I spoke to Carol I said:
“I can’t pretend it gets easier.”
she said:
“I’ve hung on, I have edged around this narrow ledge since the day I was born in 1975.”

Who’d have thought that a dour English vegan would have written a song in 2009 that paralleled the end of a zombie TV show in 2016? But, here we are. Given all the people on this show who are British but acting American, it’s enough to make Pete Carroll believe in chemtrails.

Not a lot of killin’ this episode, but a whole lotta tension. Has anyone seen Sophia?

The big driver of the episode was Carol sneaking off from Alexandria in a puffy coat. This led Daryl, then Glenn, Rosita & Michonne, and then Rick & Morgan to all go looking for Carol, leaving Alexandria guarded by Abraham, Sasha, and a few plants. Ooh – that seems like a good plan, knowing your enemy could invade at any moment.

Carol got the most killing in, taking down four Saviors with her hidden gun after she tried to talk her way through their roadblock. (Never trust someone in a puffy coat. Always hiding a gun; just ask Axel Foley.)

When last I spoke to Carol I said:
“I can’t pretend I feel love for you.”
she said:
“I’ve hammered a smile across this pasty face of mine since the day I was born in 1975.”

We never found out what happened to her after her last kill – although we saw him zombied out and eating someone later when Rick & Morgan came across the scene. She seemed to have gone for a stroll in the fields – possibly to look at the flowers – so Rick & Morgan found a trail and tried to follow her. At a barn, they found a lone human killing walkers. Rick tried to shoot him, but Morgan stopped him, and the unknown character got away.

   Wearing what appears to be unfinished Legion of Doom cosplay.

Then Rick & Morgan had a heart to heart, Morgan told him about the Wolf, and then Rick had either an epiphany or gas (based on his look). Morgan and his philosophy of “live & let live and it’ll all circle back” said he’d go look for Carol. So, now he’s gone as well.

        Konichiwa, bitches.

Glenn, Michonne & Rosita eventually found Daryl, just in time for all of them to get captured by Dwight. In between, there’s yelling about family and protection, plus thinking there’s a much bigger enemy than they’re ready for. To re-emphasize the point that Daryl should have killed Dwight the first time, Dwight shoots Daryl to end the episode on a cliffhanger.

When I said goodbye to Carol
black earth upon the casket fell
she had faded to
something I always knew
to the rescue
nobody ever comes.

Oh – while all that’s going on, Maggie may have had a miscarriage while getting a haircut. That seems like it might be important next week. Question: if a viable fetus dies in utero, will it zombify and then try to eat it’s way out?

PVR Note: The finale will be 90 minutes. Try to avoid Hardwick right after, as that’s sure to be a one-man wank.

Negan death watch: For the third week in a row, I still think Glenn is going to be the one. Morgan’s going to find Carol; they’ll chat, and then he’ll walk back to Alexandria alone – so that’ll remove them from the list. TV producers think the average viewer has a soft head, so they won’t kill a pregnant woman who may or may not have miscarried. (They don’t want letters.) My one great fear is that they end the season right before the crack of the bat, so we don’t see the character die, and we have to “Who Shot J.R.?” our way through summer.

Negan Anticipation Level: Watchmen

Of course it’s The Comedian. Until Negan, this was the most memorable bad guy Jeffrey Dean Morgan had played. All that remains is how close to expectations will it be, and how much will AMC let them show. FEED MY NEED, AMC!

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Insert Obvious “Guys Like Less Teeth, Eugene” Joke Here

Well, that brought things forward.

Why in the holy hell do you let your only doctor go out on a supply run? It’s like asking for trouble. Some people just need to be prevented from hurting themselves in spite of their best efforts. And you just know Rick’s going to take that well! Who’s going to save CORAL next time I fuck up with child care?! Mind you, she did go out pretty cool:

                          I don’t care; let me finish my pointless lecture!

Mental notes:

  1. Maybe knock it off with the speeches. Unless you’re covered in blood and/or screaming about “CORAL!!!”, maybe pass on the soliloquies. Extended periods of exposition tend to get people killed.
  2. Since you never know when you’re gonna die, take a moment to tell people you love them, instead of fighting zombies for cans of Orange Crush.
  3. Again, leave the fucking pros at home! Maybe sacrifice a redshirt or someone with no apparent future. Anyone can plant seeds; only a rare few have actual surgical skills.

Speaking of characters that seem to get in their own way, Eugene sure picks weird times to grow a pair. The “bullets are currency” speech was great, and gave an idea about his attempts to find his worth in the group. However, I’m not sure if Abraham & Eugene boiled down to “hos before bros”, or “man, I don’t think we can be friends anymore”, but Eugene sure wants different treatment from his best (only) friend after what went down with Rosita.

I can side with Eugene on wanting better treatment, but Abe was right to wax that leadhead walker. He knows Eugene is too stupid to know better; it’s “Of Mice & Men”, and Eugene is Lenny Smalls. Abe/George has to protect him from himself, and I’m supposing that’s why he followed from afar. That’s the only reason Daryl, Rosita & Eugene escaped from Dwight & the Saviors.

That was some good tension. It perfectly sets up the end of the season. We know who’s going to lead Negan to Alexandria, and it gives us another red herring or two about who is going to die in the finale.

Anyone for a little Nymphetamine?


I don’t know why, but when I saw the body in the room, I thought, “Hmm, Kirkman must listen to Cradle of Filth”, because this looks like an album cover.


                   Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.

I wasn’t sure what to make of the coda about Carol leaving. There’s lots of theories on the ol’ intertubes this morning. Me – I just figured she went for a walk in the woods, to decide whether she wants to keep going or look at the flowers with Lizzie. If we see a vision of Sophia next week, there’s your answer. Plus, I’m guessing Tobin wasn’t good in the sack.

I’m not sure if seeing Denise get killed had any influence over the character, but it was good to see Abe try and seal the deal at the end of the show.

PVR Note: stories this morning have the finale expanded to 90 minutes.

Negan death watch: I still think Glenn is going to be the one. Last week, I thought Carol’s was going to have an “episode” this week, and she’ll die as a result. I think her wandering off from Alexandria will lead to her death, but not at the hands of Negan. I think they’re just trying to keep everyone guessing.

Negan Anticipation Level: Texas Killing Fields.

Of course I’m saving The Comedian for next week. But this role also serves its purpose – a guy who just give no fucks anymore except for solving the case. But now, he is being hunted by the killer! You know there’s going to be a showdown, but you don’t know until the end which one of the detectives might die. Just like Glenn or Daryl!

Seriously, it’s going to be Glenn.


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Got A Smoke?

That was satisfying.

The episode was 99% Carol & Maggie, and that was just fine with me. There was a lot of talking this episode. But unlike the year spent on Herschel’s farm, this talking actually led to story & character developments. It also led to some fantastic killing in the second half of the episode.

First thing – thanks to theeWeeBabySeamus over on the main site for running a rivebrog during the episode. I usually have to drive-by the episode on Sunday nights due to various family commitments and/or nieces who for-some-reason can’t stand the sight of blood and POSSIBLY might have nightmares like last time. Babies.

So, Maggie & Carol got captured last episode and were taken back to another lair – a meat/rendering plant – to be used as trade bait. These Saviors, of course, had no plans to trade them, but played Rick & the gang along. Most of the episode was then just ‘ring psychology’ on all sides: the Saviors wanted information; Maggie & Carol wanted to get free. Both were buying time until one plan came to fruition.

When it came time for the deal to be made, the Saviors broke up from the group harangue of Maggie & Carol and set about planning to make the exchange (or, ambush Rick & the gang).  Carol broke free, then found Maggie. Carol implored Maggie to leave; Maggie wanted to finish off the Saviors. ALL the Saviors. So they set a zombie booby-trap and used it to take down the smoking Savior – Molly, I think – and then Maggie turned her head into a Jackson Pollack painting.

Then they set out to kill the ringleader of this faction – Paula. They got her, but not before new Carol tries to give her a way out; black & white Carol is gone, and now there are shades of gray. This shade tried to help someone who was too stupid or jaded to know they were being offered help. This is what happens to those people:

The Edible Kimmy Schmidt

When the Saviors reinforcements arrive, Maggie & Carol realize they have to finish them off, and so they lure them into a trap on the “kill floor”, and burn them alive. They know what they had to do, but they also have realized that this is not what they want to do anymore.

It seemed like Carol & Maggie switched places during the episode. Maggie is becoming the hardass, and Carol is losing her ability to kill on a whim. Oh, she can still do it – that mournful drag on the cigarette before torching the people in the kill room – but it seems like she’s looking for a way to get out of that business, and the surprise of her relationship with Tobin seems like foreshadowing of that fact. But Maggie was the one who wanted to “finish the job” and not Carol, who earlier in the show’s run was so willing to burn flu victims to purify the prison.

But, at the end of the episode, when both are in the arms of their men – Maggie with Glen; Carol with Daryl – they both admit they are done with killing. Maggie seems like she’s stopping because of the baby; Carol seems like she’s crossed a bridge. Some people & sites want to blame Morgan for this; I just think of it as a grizzled war vet who’s just decided they’ve had enough and wants to walk away. “Walking away” in the Walking Dead, however, usually means some kind of pointless death, so it’ll be a shame if this is how Carol goes out. In the comics, Carol [MAJOR COMICS SPOILER] kills herself over being the odd one out in a love triangle. That’s not happening here, but there’s still the option for the new Carol to go full-bonkers and go out in a blaze of glory.

Until then, just drink this in.

Rick, however, had no problems. The second he no longer needed Pablo/Primo/Sin Cara and he started on that “I’m Negan” noise, Rick put him down like Old Yeller. One thing Paula did say was true: They (Rick’s group) aren’t the good guys. Carol may have just realized that Rick is the cure, but is he worse than the disease?

Negan death watch: I still think Glen is going to be the one. I think Carol’s going to have an “episode” and she’ll die as a result.

Negan Anticipation Level: Spartacus

No sign of the impending arrival this week, so I’m taking a tangent. The Saviors all noted how they “are all Negan”, and responded to queries about his location with “I am Negan”. I’m going to call it both a combination of Stockholm Syndrome and being part of a mafia crew. Invoking the name is supposed to bring fear to the opponent; saying his name shows you are a part of his crew, and that he protects you. Also, if Negan rules the apocalypse, saying his name shows fealty or reverence, and that doing so will prevent your own demise. Rick’s crew only knows Rick, so the name means nothing to them. Once he shows up, though, they’ll know who he is.

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