Tag Archives: Not Dustin Rowles

If Meat Is Murder, Is Cannibalism Suicide?

When last I spoke to Carol I said:
“I can’t pretend it gets easier.”
she said:
“I’ve hung on, I have edged around this narrow ledge since the day I was born in 1975.”

Who’d have thought that a dour English vegan would have written a song in 2009 that paralleled the end of a zombie TV show in 2016? But, here we are. Given all the people on this show who are British but acting American, it’s enough to make Pete Carroll believe in chemtrails.

Not a lot of killin’ this episode, but a whole lotta tension. Has anyone seen Sophia?

The big driver of the episode was Carol sneaking off from Alexandria in a puffy coat. This led Daryl, then Glenn, Rosita & Michonne, and then Rick & Morgan to all go looking for Carol, leaving Alexandria guarded by Abraham, Sasha, and a few plants. Ooh – that seems like a good plan, knowing your enemy could invade at any moment.

Carol got the most killing in, taking down four Saviors with her hidden gun after she tried to talk her way through their roadblock. (Never trust someone in a puffy coat. Always hiding a gun; just ask Axel Foley.)

When last I spoke to Carol I said:
“I can’t pretend I feel love for you.”
she said:
“I’ve hammered a smile across this pasty face of mine since the day I was born in 1975.”

We never found out what happened to her after her last kill – although we saw him zombied out and eating someone later when Rick & Morgan came across the scene. She seemed to have gone for a stroll in the fields – possibly to look at the flowers – so Rick & Morgan found a trail and tried to follow her. At a barn, they found a lone human killing walkers. Rick tried to shoot him, but Morgan stopped him, and the unknown character got away.

   Wearing what appears to be unfinished Legion of Doom cosplay.

Then Rick & Morgan had a heart to heart, Morgan told him about the Wolf, and then Rick had either an epiphany or gas (based on his look). Morgan and his philosophy of “live & let live and it’ll all circle back” said he’d go look for Carol. So, now he’s gone as well.

        Konichiwa, bitches.

Glenn, Michonne & Rosita eventually found Daryl, just in time for all of them to get captured by Dwight. In between, there’s yelling about family and protection, plus thinking there’s a much bigger enemy than they’re ready for. To re-emphasize the point that Daryl should have killed Dwight the first time, Dwight shoots Daryl to end the episode on a cliffhanger.

When I said goodbye to Carol
black earth upon the casket fell
she had faded to
something I always knew
to the rescue
nobody ever comes.

Oh – while all that’s going on, Maggie may have had a miscarriage while getting a haircut. That seems like it might be important next week. Question: if a viable fetus dies in utero, will it zombify and then try to eat it’s way out?

PVR Note: The finale will be 90 minutes. Try to avoid Hardwick right after, as that’s sure to be a one-man wank.

Negan death watch: For the third week in a row, I still think Glenn is going to be the one. Morgan’s going to find Carol; they’ll chat, and then he’ll walk back to Alexandria alone – so that’ll remove them from the list. TV producers think the average viewer has a soft head, so they won’t kill a pregnant woman who may or may not have miscarried. (They don’t want letters.) My one great fear is that they end the season right before the crack of the bat, so we don’t see the character die, and we have to “Who Shot J.R.?” our way through summer.

Negan Anticipation Level: Watchmen

Of course it’s The Comedian. Until Negan, this was the most memorable bad guy Jeffrey Dean Morgan had played. All that remains is how close to expectations will it be, and how much will AMC let them show. FEED MY NEED, AMC!

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Insert Obvious “Guys Like Less Teeth, Eugene” Joke Here

Well, that brought things forward.

Why in the holy hell do you let your only doctor go out on a supply run? It’s like asking for trouble. Some people just need to be prevented from hurting themselves in spite of their best efforts. And you just know Rick’s going to take that well! Who’s going to save CORAL next time I fuck up with child care?! Mind you, she did go out pretty cool:

                          I don’t care; let me finish my pointless lecture!

Mental notes:

  1. Maybe knock it off with the speeches. Unless you’re covered in blood and/or screaming about “CORAL!!!”, maybe pass on the soliloquies. Extended periods of exposition tend to get people killed.
  2. Since you never know when you’re gonna die, take a moment to tell people you love them, instead of fighting zombies for cans of Orange Crush.
  3. Again, leave the fucking pros at home! Maybe sacrifice a redshirt or someone with no apparent future. Anyone can plant seeds; only a rare few have actual surgical skills.

Speaking of characters that seem to get in their own way, Eugene sure picks weird times to grow a pair. The “bullets are currency” speech was great, and gave an idea about his attempts to find his worth in the group. However, I’m not sure if Abraham & Eugene boiled down to “hos before bros”, or “man, I don’t think we can be friends anymore”, but Eugene sure wants different treatment from his best (only) friend after what went down with Rosita.

I can side with Eugene on wanting better treatment, but Abe was right to wax that leadhead walker. He knows Eugene is too stupid to know better; it’s “Of Mice & Men”, and Eugene is Lenny Smalls. Abe/George has to protect him from himself, and I’m supposing that’s why he followed from afar. That’s the only reason Daryl, Rosita & Eugene escaped from Dwight & the Saviors.

That was some good tension. It perfectly sets up the end of the season. We know who’s going to lead Negan to Alexandria, and it gives us another red herring or two about who is going to die in the finale.

Anyone for a little Nymphetamine?


I don’t know why, but when I saw the body in the room, I thought, “Hmm, Kirkman must listen to Cradle of Filth”, because this looks like an album cover.


                   Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.

I wasn’t sure what to make of the coda about Carol leaving. There’s lots of theories on the ol’ intertubes this morning. Me – I just figured she went for a walk in the woods, to decide whether she wants to keep going or look at the flowers with Lizzie. If we see a vision of Sophia next week, there’s your answer. Plus, I’m guessing Tobin wasn’t good in the sack.

I’m not sure if seeing Denise get killed had any influence over the character, but it was good to see Abe try and seal the deal at the end of the show.

PVR Note: stories this morning have the finale expanded to 90 minutes.

Negan death watch: I still think Glenn is going to be the one. Last week, I thought Carol’s was going to have an “episode” this week, and she’ll die as a result. I think her wandering off from Alexandria will lead to her death, but not at the hands of Negan. I think they’re just trying to keep everyone guessing.

Negan Anticipation Level: Texas Killing Fields.

Of course I’m saving The Comedian for next week. But this role also serves its purpose – a guy who just give no fucks anymore except for solving the case. But now, he is being hunted by the killer! You know there’s going to be a showdown, but you don’t know until the end which one of the detectives might die. Just like Glenn or Daryl!

Seriously, it’s going to be Glenn.


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Got A Smoke?

That was satisfying.

The episode was 99% Carol & Maggie, and that was just fine with me. There was a lot of talking this episode. But unlike the year spent on Herschel’s farm, this talking actually led to story & character developments. It also led to some fantastic killing in the second half of the episode.

First thing – thanks to theeWeeBabySeamus over on the main site for running a rivebrog during the episode. I usually have to drive-by the episode on Sunday nights due to various family commitments and/or nieces who for-some-reason can’t stand the sight of blood and POSSIBLY might have nightmares like last time. Babies.

So, Maggie & Carol got captured last episode and were taken back to another lair – a meat/rendering plant – to be used as trade bait. These Saviors, of course, had no plans to trade them, but played Rick & the gang along. Most of the episode was then just ‘ring psychology’ on all sides: the Saviors wanted information; Maggie & Carol wanted to get free. Both were buying time until one plan came to fruition.

When it came time for the deal to be made, the Saviors broke up from the group harangue of Maggie & Carol and set about planning to make the exchange (or, ambush Rick & the gang).  Carol broke free, then found Maggie. Carol implored Maggie to leave; Maggie wanted to finish off the Saviors. ALL the Saviors. So they set a zombie booby-trap and used it to take down the smoking Savior – Molly, I think – and then Maggie turned her head into a Jackson Pollack painting.

Then they set out to kill the ringleader of this faction – Paula. They got her, but not before new Carol tries to give her a way out; black & white Carol is gone, and now there are shades of gray. This shade tried to help someone who was too stupid or jaded to know they were being offered help. This is what happens to those people:

The Edible Kimmy Schmidt

When the Saviors reinforcements arrive, Maggie & Carol realize they have to finish them off, and so they lure them into a trap on the “kill floor”, and burn them alive. They know what they had to do, but they also have realized that this is not what they want to do anymore.

It seemed like Carol & Maggie switched places during the episode. Maggie is becoming the hardass, and Carol is losing her ability to kill on a whim. Oh, she can still do it – that mournful drag on the cigarette before torching the people in the kill room – but it seems like she’s looking for a way to get out of that business, and the surprise of her relationship with Tobin seems like foreshadowing of that fact. But Maggie was the one who wanted to “finish the job” and not Carol, who earlier in the show’s run was so willing to burn flu victims to purify the prison.

But, at the end of the episode, when both are in the arms of their men – Maggie with Glen; Carol with Daryl – they both admit they are done with killing. Maggie seems like she’s stopping because of the baby; Carol seems like she’s crossed a bridge. Some people & sites want to blame Morgan for this; I just think of it as a grizzled war vet who’s just decided they’ve had enough and wants to walk away. “Walking away” in the Walking Dead, however, usually means some kind of pointless death, so it’ll be a shame if this is how Carol goes out. In the comics, Carol [MAJOR COMICS SPOILER] kills herself over being the odd one out in a love triangle. That’s not happening here, but there’s still the option for the new Carol to go full-bonkers and go out in a blaze of glory.

Until then, just drink this in.

Rick, however, had no problems. The second he no longer needed Pablo/Primo/Sin Cara and he started on that “I’m Negan” noise, Rick put him down like Old Yeller. One thing Paula did say was true: They (Rick’s group) aren’t the good guys. Carol may have just realized that Rick is the cure, but is he worse than the disease?

Negan death watch: I still think Glen is going to be the one. I think Carol’s going to have an “episode” and she’ll die as a result.

Negan Anticipation Level: Spartacus

No sign of the impending arrival this week, so I’m taking a tangent. The Saviors all noted how they “are all Negan”, and responded to queries about his location with “I am Negan”. I’m going to call it both a combination of Stockholm Syndrome and being part of a mafia crew. Invoking the name is supposed to bring fear to the opponent; saying his name shows you are a part of his crew, and that he protects you. Also, if Negan rules the apocalypse, saying his name shows fealty or reverence, and that doing so will prevent your own demise. Rick’s crew only knows Rick, so the name means nothing to them. Once he shows up, though, they’ll know who he is.

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How Can Things Be Bad When I’ve Made Cookies?

(Last time on “The Walking Dead”, The TKEs and the Deltas decide to join forces against the Kappa Sigs.)

Now THAT was a pretty good episode. Lotsa killing, both of the human and walker kind.

             Always relevant

FYI, Carol proved why you can’t/don’t wear white during the zombie apocalypse. Totally agree with the beets in the cookies thing; roasted sugar beets kick ass.

BTW, where did that relationship come from? I guess Darol (Caryl?) is never going to happen, then. (OMG – HE’S GOING TO DIE!!!1!!1!)

Rick is the man with a plan. Morgan is the man with a code.


After essentially bullying Alexandria into following his agenda, they use the guy from Hilltop (Michael? Tibor? Cabbage?) to plot out where best to attack the Saviors compound and what lies behind various doors.


Abraham dumps Rosita COLD! Finding out you’re dumped because other women exist has to be brutal. I don’t recall too many movies about soldiers leaving their girls before going into battle. Right after the breakup, the first person she sees is Eugene; so much for empathy. If Abraham gets killed by Negan, most female viewers will approve; MRAs will object.

The consensus line of the night went to Cabbage Andy, noting that Negan & the Saviors are scary, “but those pricks got nuthin’ on you.” This comes after Rick roughs up a severed head to make it look like Gregory’s, which was the price Andy had to pay the Saviors in order to get his brother back.

Aside – GQ made a pretty cool comparison to the Saviors base and the N64 “Goldeneye” game:

It’s probably just a random, abandoned government base, though. Pity; I don’t think Sean Bean‘s ever been a zombie.

The assault showed pretty much who was where in the redeemability scale: (main characters only)

  • Glenn – killed someone, but was emotional about doing so, like he was the last one to lose his grip on humanity. Until he and Heath had to survive a firefight. Kill or be killed at that point.
  • Rick, Michonne & Daryl – killing is their business
  • Abraham – the worst. Killed Saviors, but also killed love. His poor situational awareness led to the alarm being sounded.

Carol & Maggie stayed behind at the camper. Carol didn’t want to, but when she feared Maggie going in would cost her her baby, the I-miss-Sophia gene kicked in and she helped guard the rear in order to help guard the fetus. That turned out to have been a bad decision.

The episode ends with seemingly most of the Saviors dead and the group relaxing, until a motorcycle emerges and they have to catch the escapee. Then they hear on his radio that the people on the other end have captured Carol & Maggie. Now it’s a Mexican standoff.

Prediction: Glenn will be the one Negan kills.

I know what the comics say, and I know the show writers try to misdirect, but watching the episode made me think that Glenn will sacrifice himself because he no longer wants to live in this world, because killing the sleeping Savior took the last big piece of humanity he had left. Glenn seeing those Polaroids let him know what kind of monsters they’ve killed, but in cold blood just doesn’t suit him. The last small piece kept the kid from killing the other sleeper and doing it himself. (Let the kid go on the road trip with a clear conscience.) That’ll be what allows him to sacrifice himself for Maggie when Negan tries to kill her.

Negan Anticipation Level: The Losers

If you saw that movie, JDM’s character Clay reacted poorly to being ambushed, seeing children die and his men almost killed. Negan in the comics is a sociopath who kills anyone that interferes with his plans. The Polaroids of caved-in heads on the wall doesn’t bode well for when he shows up to exact his revenge for the Alexandrian’s assault on “his” base. (I’m fairly certain he considers the Saviors themselves pawns.) That’ll be a gut-wrenching finale.

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The Oscars Are On, So Let’s Talk Sorghum Production

There is, however, always time for tomacco.

(Last time on “The Walking Dead”, ROAD TRIP!)

Like the worst episode of “Rock Bottom” ever, instead of talking about the prostitutes ’round back, the characters really did want to talk about seed crops and sustainable harvests. It’s like Leo took his Oscars acceptance speech from the discarded plot lines for this episode. THOSE ARE NOT THE TOMATOES I WAS ASKING ABOUT!

I don’t know if it was on purpose, but it really seemed like the show didn’t really want to counter-program against the Oscars. Sure, the story progressed, and Jesus took everyone back to his place, but the relative lack of action seemed – to me – like they accepted that a certain percentage of their audience was going to be invested in the Best Picture category, and so they sacrificed progression in favour of not getting negative twitter reviews.

cracked - walking dead

Before I get to my ramblings, I’d like to direct you to a good story on Cracked about what it’s like in the town where they shoot “The Walking Dead”. I’m directing you to their site (links provided above) because, like most people who write on BBM or DFO, I believe the people who create the content should get the credit & clicks. Unlike other sites, they’ve managed to maintain their standards for writing without #sellingout and reworking the site to maximize clickbait opportunities. A summary wouldn’t do it justice.

[Update: I don’t know how to feel right now… (redacted)]

Abraham be gettin’ some! Big Red was dreaming about Sasha, but woke up next to Rosita. Like any normal man, he took that shower invitation when it was offered. There’s not too many women in the apocalypse, but I guess there’s still a field to be played. His line to Daryl about “double wrapping” was a bit comical, coming from a guy who clearly had never worried about that decision in his former life. Rosita gave him a small keepsake she made just for him, so whatever his intentions are, she’s already looking at dresses. There is no way this ends badly, but who knew you could play out a “Three’s Company” plot during the zombie apocalypse?

Jesus running around while everyone was asleep awoke Alexandria to the fact that, according to Abraham (and possibly my mishearing), Rick & Michonne were “pumping bugglies”. The better line was when Abraham asked Daryl if he’d ever considered settling down, and he responded with, “What makes you think she settled?” Deep thoughts followed. BURN!

Of course Carl would be cool with it, Rick. If he knows Dad’s #UpForWhatever, then it gives him permission to be warm for Enid’s form. Volunteering to babysit Judith just makes him look more responsible; it’s like borrowing a niece for the day when you are in university.

                That’s gonna leave a mark.

Jesus took everyone to the mountaintop Hilltop. I’m kinda torn on whether or not he’s “their Daryl”. Everyone was nice but suspicious, like Alexandria, but they didn’t try to eat them, like Terminus. Thanks to rescuing Hilltop’s doctor, Maggie got an ultrasound which confirmed the pregnancy but gave everyone a case of the deep thoughts.

Natalie Maggie got a character upgrade. Rick let her handle the negotiations with the Hilltop’s leader, Gregory (Xander Berkeley), because he knew it probably wouldn’t go well if he worked the room. After a stabbing gave everyone some proper perspective (Ray Lewis knows this), she got Alexandria a pretty good deal. On paper; in the course of events, it’s going to go badly.

FYI: in real life, Lauren Cohan got a haircut.

                    Yup; that’s all good.

                        Looks cool; they didn’t do it.


Why am I yammering on so much about plot details? Well, that’s because there were only (by my count) 4 walker kills and one human kill. The human kill is important, because it eventually gives way to…




Negan Anticipation Level: Batman v Superman

This episode was the first one where the gravity of the man-who-is-coming was made apparent to Rick & the gang. Their response of, “We can take him,” doesn’t bode well, if only because we’ve seen how all their previous plans have turned out. [Conceive; attempt; fail; regroup; re-plan; re-attempt; succeed (?); profit (?)] Someone’s gonna die; at this point, the only mystery is who, and how much of their blood will AMC allow to be shown. The waiting game is on how accurate Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s take on the character will be, and can/will it live up to audience expectations.

Anyway, that’s it for this episode. Next week, the gang probably learns not all road trips end up in Pound Town, unless there’s possibly more than one meaning to the word “pound”.


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What Goes On the Road, Should Stay On the Road

(Last time on “The Walking Dead”, headshots & beatings & bazookas, oh my!)

Personal aside – boy, does having to be in the hospital suck. But at least when I woke up I wasn’t in an abandoned hospital surrounded by walkers. Sorry I’m late.

Well, at least we didn’t get too much related to the body collection and bonfires I was worried about.

Thankfully, that was due to the time jump. It seemed a necessary plot device, and it also avoided another “Herschel’s farm” episode of Rick sitting by a shot-Carl’s bed while the plot goes nowhere.

Instead, after a seeming disaster, Rick & Daryl did what most bros would do: road trip.

And, like all road trips, they made a new friend,

Had a few laughs,

And invited him back to their place.






Back home, all the necessary drama took place around Spencer, who found & put to rest his walker-Mom.





As a personal aside, it was refreshing to see this lady – Tovah Feldshuh – die in something, as every time she was on “Law & Order” (13 episodes!) I wanted to see her character killed. It’s a tribute to her skill as an actress that she had a presence (at least to me) that crossed over from another show. I wanted to watch so I could watch her get what was coming to her.

You should’ve done it, Ben Stone.

Which gets us to the fan fiction part of the episode – Richonne. The time jump doesn’t give us insight into how and/or when the moves got made. And I suppose there are thousands of words (ROWLES!) outlining where there might have been hints all along about how inevitable this pairing was. I’m sure there’s also been (or going to be) some History major whose written a think-piece about Richonne, Alexandria, and the 50th anniversary of Loving vs. Virginia.

Me, I choose to see it quite simply. The new girl he’d been trying to date got horribly killed a couple of months back, and so he turned to someone familiar for comfort. Someone he’d known a long time, and also a person who also wanted someone to care about. Who says you gotta be lonely in the apocalypse?

I’m just glad they never covered the awkward first moves, and the inevitable comedic scene where the lady with the machete tells the guy trying to get fresh to back off, only to realize it was what she wanted the whole time as well.

Anyway, that’s it for this episode. Next week, tune in for Jesus taking the bros back to his campus to meet his frat!

Negan Anticipation Level: The Good Wife

Still no sign yet. But, wherever Jesus is taking Rick & Daryl, there’s going to be (or have been) an impact of his presence having been there. On “The Good Wife”, Jeffrey Dean Morgan got in the face of Chris Noth, who was on “Law & Order”, where Tovah Feldshuh (as Dianne Melnick) also got in Chris Noth’s face. Synergy!


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…I Went Down, Down Down, and The Flames Went Higher.

(Last time on “The Walking Dead”, not enough people died & there was too much talking)

I don’t want to recap the episode. Frankly, enough sites, including [redacted] do that, and frankly keep over-analyzing the show. I just wanna talk about fun or salient stuff.

                                                           You’ve been warned.

Ignoring the fact that this season so far has simply been a hyper-violent version of the season on Herschel’s farm, I get the distinct impression that the last two episodes take place in a single day. At least Dale isn’t around & chirping weak morals. That’s what Morgan is for, and he’s at least proficient with his stick.

It appears cleansing by fire was the theme of Sunday’s mid-season return episode. Daryl gets to use a bazooka twice, to differing, awesome effect.

                                          This was the weaker of the two.

No main characters died, but Rick’s hot blonde girlfriend and her snotty younger son got eaten. And the older son freaked out about it, so he tried to shoot Rick. But because Michonne gut him like a fish, he ended up hitting Carl instead.

Now he’s not just mopey. Now he looks like he worships Golan the Insatiable.

Four years ago, people wanted Carl dead ‘just because’. Now he’s becoming one of the best characters. There’s no way the character doesn’t become a barely-controlled rage monster wrapped inside a confused teenager. It will be ridiculous fun.

Glenn somehow survived his own idiocy again. When they do eventually kill him off, by that time no one will care – and they’ll probably be relieved that their chain will no longer be yanked.

Counterargument: sex with Maggie adds hit points to your character.

Anyway, that’s it for this episode. Next week, stay tuned for a riveting hour of body collection and bonfires. Plus, I’m sure more of Negan’s henchmen will probably show up. Speaking of which…

Negan Anticipation Level: Grey’s Anatomy

We know he’s coming, but we’re not sure when. Since it’s the first episode of the second half of the season, I didn’t expect he’d show up, so he gets the lowest of all possible ratings – one related to forced affection for Katherine Heigl.

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